Years ago, I have been thinking about being a stay-at-home mummy. I have talked, thought and complained to everyone about it, even wished that I dont need to slog at work, tolerated all that crap everyday just to stay at home with the kids...
Well, I seem to got my wish when I was ordered to be on bed-rest last July and right now its September which means that I have been staying at home for nearly 2 months. I have to admit that its a boring and though very fulfilling job, it is very routine. Yes, I finally got to spend quality time with the kids and able to attend to all of my husband's and children's needs, finally all the housework are done in a day and all those nitty-gritty stuff that I meant to do is finally all done. But somehow, after all that is said and done, I always find an excuse to go out each day like taking a walk or even going back to school to visit the kids.
Maybe I am not just used to staying at home yet....Sometimes I find myself wishing back at work and being piled with tons of worksheets to be marked and covered with art pieces....weird huh? Maybe its just me, I just need something out of home for a few hours each day by myself...some sort of private time and personal space. Back at home using the toilet is the only personal time I have (though Shadiq intrudes into it at times). And besides my own family, I do feel the need to interact with other people like my colleagues and friends.
So do I really want to be a stay-at-home mummy? Maybe its just not the right time yet. The best I can do is to just work for half-a-day which is like for four hours. At least I have my own money to spend. Herman let me do that next year once he is posted to the circle line. Until the time I decided to quit the workforce.....besides we already plan to have baby number 3 in three to five years time so need to save money for that!
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